No, men and women aren’t from completely different planets. (Talk about a long-distance relationship!)
Oh sure, watch enough television (boob-evision, as in “boob-tube,” not in terms of “hooters-tube”) and listen to enough stand-up comedy and you might be left with the impression that it’s a wonder how males and females ever get along. Men, with all that immature beer-drinking, sports-watching, sexual obsession and emotional cluelessness. Women with all that mature emotional insight, but still shoe and chocolate-obsessed, gossiping-mongering craziness. Or something.
Although you might not know it from the above gross stereotypes/caricatures, it’s a whole new world out there, baby. We’ve got metrosexual men, stay-at-home dads . . . we’ve got corporate ladder-climbing women who have no problem telling men what to do, without breaking down and crying under the stress.
Are we heading toward a time of functional androgyny, of a mixing of the sexual characteristics, with men psychologically migrating into the realm of feminine traits, women into the realm of masculine?
Perhaps. Somewhat for some individuals in some social/cultural environments. And yet . . .
Recent research of college-age men and women have found that one gender difference persists.
As hooking up takes over from dating as a means of heterosexual interaction on university campuses, more women than men continue to prefer dating whereas more men than women rate hooking up above dating. Both genders however perceive similar benefits and risks to dating and hooking up. Carolyn Bradshaw from James Madison University in Virginia, US, and colleagues explored the reasons that motivate college men and women to hook up or to date, as well as the perceived relative benefits and costs of the two practices. Their findings are published online in Springer’s journal Sex Roles. [source; bold mine]
In the words of Richard Dawkins, will our “selfish genes” — the male Y and the female X — place a limit upon how similar the genders could become on attitudes about, sex? Evolutionary psychology would tell us that, of course, men prefer hooking up because they can sow their “seed” more widely. Women prefer dating so as to assure the guy is going to stick around and help raise the offspring, should any result. But is it really the case? Will it always be the case?
An interesting additional finding was this -
Even though men initiated significantly more first dates than women, there was no gender difference in the number of first dates or number of hook-ups. For both men and women, the number of hook ups was nearly double the number of first dates.
I’m not sure whether this has always been the case, with men and women engaging in similar, high levels of casual sex. But if not, if sexual behavior is becoming more androgynous, perhaps the thinking and values will soon catch up to the behavior.
Or maybe not.
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Tags: evolutionary psychology, gender, sexuality
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